dawgma

OK: before I saw the video; I said to myself; no way a Church should ban an autistic child; after seeing the video; I am wondering if there are meds that can keep him calm while in church..cause it's a shame if he and his family can't go; but I understand the Church's point of view; especially when it comes to another child being hit.

So, guess I am with the church on this one also.

This really has nothing to do with his Autism. It's about his being able to control his behavior, no matter what condition he has. The safety of others HAS to be a priority. This mother clearly doesn't get that.

Why she would even be willing to put others in danger is beyond me. Why not create a separate area for the family to sit, like a cry room?

Cant really blame the church.

Why would this mother insist on bringing her son to church when he can get so out of control and dangerous. Doesnt she care about other people?

His mom must have know how dangerous he could be and how she obviously cant always control him. Hes a big kid.

And the urninating. COME ON MOM. Why are you mad that people are not willing to accept that in church? Loud noises. Disruptive. Its like she brings him there KNOWING he will cause a problem.

I only know one mother with an autistic child. Now that he is 13 yrs old he has gotten too big for her to handle alone. She ON PURSOSE avoids crowded places for that very reason. Its call being responsible. She does want him to hurt anyone else even thou he isnt really meaning to.

I'm sure she could find a solution, unless she just wants it to be a problem.

hhmm...I got to say I am torn. Yes I understand that the church certainly has to put the welfare of everyone ahead of them going to church. But I am thinking there has to be another way...another cry room maybe?

its all well and good for you all to judge her ... how many of you have walked even a few steps in the shoes she is walking. I feel for her...yet I wouldnt want to put anyone else in danger either, nor should she.

But also consider this....1 out of 150 children are being diagnosed with autism or autism spectrum (and that is a # from a yr or 2 ago...it is growing!) we need to figure out how best to handle these things with dignity and what is best and right for everyone. jmo...

I'll agree that this is a difficult situation. I think I would have to side with the church on this one, though. If there is a cry room available that is not being used, that would certainly be an option. Building a new 'room' for this child could be a logistical (and maybe even a financial) problem. Another option would be to have a separate service for the mother and this child.

By the way, I believe that the Catholic Church only views missing mass on Sundays (and holy days of obligation) to be a sin if done so intentionally. If this mother and child are missing mass due to this situation, it is not intentional, and therefore not a sin.

Wow... She's catholic so I lack a point of reference. I would think there are other catholic churches where perhaps an usher or church member would help with the situation. It could have been any church though I suppose. Seems to me the best course of action would be to find a church where folks would support and even help her and her son. I know such congregations do exsist.

All I know is I would never bring a big hulking (and scary to some) kid to church if he had ANY possibility of getting out of control and harming anyone. I realize mom wants to go to church, and she should. But forcing him on everyone else is just wrong. People are coming to worship, and having to worry about him all the time is not something they should have to do. People go to church to be peaceful, not uncomfortable about the guy next to them peeing themselves.I don't think anyone there is trying to act as though they don't want to accept people with mental disabilities, they are trying to keep him from running off the whole congregation. Sometimes we must sacrifice one for the good of all. The priest will come to the house to give communion and pray with the family, and that will relieve the mother of having to deal with it. Unless, like someone else said, she just wants to. I have worked with parents of disabled kids before, and some do take a attitude of "I have to deal with it and so do you, and if you don't you're a bad person". This is not a pity party. Leave him at home until you can trust him; but that may be never.