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andyandeye's Blog

by andyandeye from Cedar Hill, MO

Last Post 165 days, 8 hours Ago


This little thing called life....
Nov 5, 2007 | 7:28 AM
Category: News
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You live, you die, and that's a fact. But sometimes it's not really that easy.

I'm hurting right now. Not because someone is dying, but because I have to watch the grief and sadness in my husband's eyes, and there is nothing I can do.

Grandma has been in the hospital for a couple of weeks now. They moved her to a rehab center. And it seems it's all down hill now. Andy spoke to his Grandpa on the phone last night. Andrew has NEVER heard his Grandpa cry. She's having trouble speaking, and he can't get her to eat anything.

Andrew left this morning for Ohio. I think it's for the best. He needs to be there. I wish we could all go. We'd probably just be in the way.

Andy's dad is in denial, he refuses to go to the hospital on a regular basis. He refuses to drive his dad there when he wants, forcing Grandpa to drive himself. Grandpa has cancer on the bottom of his feet, and it's very painful to walk much less drive. His Dad spends the day at home drinking, sleeping and drinking.

Andy's sister refuses to go see her. "I won't be able to handle what Grandma has become"

I don't understand these reactions. For me, it's common sense to do these things for the people you love. Isn't it?

If I was close, I would be taking turns w/ Andy's cousins and uncle sitting w/ them at the hosp. And happy to do so!

My mom told me that everyone handles situations like this differently, and there's nothing I can do about it. What I want to do is call them both up and bitch them out royally. Andy said once he gets there, he's going to try to talk sense into his dad. Good luck w/ that.

Meanwhile, here at home, I'll pray, cry a little, and I'm going to send Grandma red roses. I found out this last year that on her birthday her best friend used to send her red roses every year, because they were her favorite. Up until her friend died.

Maybe it'll make her smile a little.
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Member Comments Total Comments: 12
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LadyCardFan read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 7:51 AM

I feel for your husband. Sad to say, but some just don't "get it". I'm happy for Andy that he is able to make the trip. I know when my mother called me about my grandmother that I was prepared to do whatever it took to help her. She knew this day would come and we had worked to prepare her program for her funeral, which was already planned.

Keep strong for hubby and he'll get through this. That support system he has will help immensely.
superjaybrd read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 9:23 AM

It's amazing how some people react to seeing someone they love seriously ill.
Last summer our family went through that with my Grandma. She was also at a rehab center here in St. Louis. I would have loved to have been with her every day, but with the kids, I didn't want a big ruckus there all the time. Luckily, my mom and dad or my aunt were with her every day/all day until the very end.
I wish peace within your family and the loving hand of God on your husband's grandmother.
old_as_the_superbowl read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 10:17 AM

I've been in similar situations as most of us have. It is hard to see the "pillars" in our life show vulnerability.

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harp read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 11:19 AM

I will be praying very hard please keep us up on things...
VBallR read my blog
Nov 5, 2007 | 3:35 PM

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. We are going through something very similar in my husbands family too so I know how you feel. My husband doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't want to deal with it, and seems angry about the whole situation. I'm just trying to be as supportive as possible.
jeanette read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 5:35 PM

Eye tell Andy he and his grandma and grandpa are in my prayers.
candsw read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 7:57 PM

Praying for your family.
marymaxine read my blog
Nov 5, 2007 | 8:02 PM

Sickness and sorrow come to all of us. If we never suffered tragedy and we never felt sorrow, how could our souls grow?
It's true we all grieve in our own way. Some carry it deep inside. Other's feel empty. For some they may feel nothing.
How sad it would be if your husband, had this burden all alone. But, he has you, words say so little when the heart means so much.
Sophia121 read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 8:52 PM

The loss of a loved one is NEVER easy. My thoughts and Prayers are with you Eye and your family.

God Bless
FIGMAN read my blog view my photos
Nov 5, 2007 | 9:29 PM

Eye..this is off your subject for the moment..did you find work and does Andy fly and F-15? I see where they have been grounded after the crash the other day in my area. By the way not a new guy here, just an old guy returning..!
andyandeye read my blog view my photos
Nov 6, 2007 | 7:05 AM

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers..

It does mean alot.

Figman, Andy is a mechanic on the F-15, they were definitely grounded though, until it's investigated. That means less work for all.

I have been working parttime since Jan and really like my job.

We'll be moving next year, as they're sending the F-15s elsewhere.
Tiggerme68 read my blog
Nov 6, 2007 | 10:59 AM

I'm so sorry that your family has to go through this. My dad died almost 3 yrs ago. I took care him the last few months he lived. My mom had been injured and wasn't able to care for herself much less take care of him. I didn't think about, I just did it. Knowing how difficult it was for me when my dad was sick and then dying, I can't imagine how much worse it'll be when it's my mom's time to go.
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andyandeye

My husband and I have been married for 14 years, and have 3 boys. I work part time as a receptionist for a Chiropractor, and I have to say, I LOVE MY JOB! On my days off, I love hanging out at the river, and my new hobby fishing. I also sew on the side, odd jobs and such. I'm hoping to get back into crafting now that the kids are back in school.

Member Since: 1/4/2007


 

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