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In anticipation of what is expected to be a long wait for the next measurable snowfall in the St Louis area, weather bloggers have turned to group therapy sessions to combat the anxiety, depression, paranoia, and the resultant unhealthy behaviors associated with the frustration of waiting for snow.

The weather bloggers hold their thrice-weekly group therapy sessions at an undisclosed location

Those weather bloggers who are not currently incarcerated, awaiting trial, or banned for threatening behavior have agreed to meet approximately 3 times a week for support and coping strategies.

One blogger, chain smoking with lit cigarettes in each hand and balancing a warm tumbler of whiskey on his knee, voiced the concern the group has regarding the fear they have that it will never snow again. In a shaking voice he told his story and ended it on a desperate note. "I mean, I had over a foot on that last one. I just know that is never going to happen again, man. Ever. Do you HEAR ME? I'm so scared that it's over." He inhaled deeply and began quietly sobbing, "It's going to be so #$%#$ hot here this summer, I don't think I can get through this again. Someone is going to have to pay." Other group members nodded and murmured their concerns.

This is an odd and eclectic group whose secrecy borders on outright paranoia. No Channel 2 employees or staff members are allowed to attend and the group demands to meet in a locked, password-protected room, provided and paid for by Fox2. As members took turns telling their personal stories, they were occasionally interrupted by text messages from other bloggers wanting to come in the room.

"Hey...anyone know W--------?", asked a college-aged blogger, "he wants in and keeps asking for the password...yes or no?"

"NO!", many of the bloggers instantly responded. A particularly authoritative-bordering-on-obnoxiously-rude blogger screamed "Do not even answer that text...do you hear me? Do NOT answer him...ignore him!"

Other requests were met with replies of "Oh yeah, that person's cool, let 'em in" or "I don't know" repeatedly until the person making the request gave up after texting increasingly angry and curse-laden messages.

These interruptions continued to pepper the storytelling with the occasional blogger being let in and welcomed warmly by the bloggers.

There are moments of hope, such as when one blogger brought up the recent earthquakes and aftershocks. All agreed it was a great moment that left them elated, but fearful of hoping for more. "Look, we need at least a 6 here before I can start to get happy about this," said one blogger, "and I would really be jazzed by something in the sevens - not that I would hope for any death or destruction, of course. I mean who wants THAT? Well, you know, not much any way. Not really. I mean, what happens, happens, and it's not my fault if a huge friggin quake splits the earth...."

A volunteer group leader cleared her throat and suggested that the group should perhaps "move along." One blogger suggested that maybe the group could "get into" crop circles since it's "kind of a spring and summer-type occurrence" and
"we have all of southern Illinois...it could happen." A quick vote of the group nixed that idea since all agreed it was not really "weather". An erudite young blogger summed it up by noting that "waiting for a front that to move in that will probably dissipate right before it hits the metro is agonizing enough....can you imagine how strung out we'd all be waiting for crop circles??"

At this point. things took a turn for the worse. Possibly sensing the inevitability of a frustrating wait all summer for the chance to wait for snow in the fall, the mood turned ugly and the paranoia flared.

"Hey, when did he get here," one of the members said, pointing to a blogger who goes only by the number "2" and who had thus far remained silent. "Who let him in?"

A weather blogger confronts a silent group therapy member suspected of being a management interloper. Paranoia is common among the bloggers.

The group quickly turned en masse on this particular person firing questions at him "Who ARE you, anyway? Did management send you? Are you keeping a log?"

"No," was his only response, with no further explanation of whether or not he was indeed a "Fox news overlord" as he has been accused of in the past. And just like that, what had seemed like a dangerous situation about to dissolve into chaos and violence, possibly involving arson, now abated into a calmer, albeit fetid, atmosphere.

"What is the point of having a password if Fr------ is just going to give it to every Gomer who asks for it," sighed one even-tempered member. "This room belongs to all of us, not just him, he shouldn't do that."

One by one, the group members slipped away, some noticeably intoxicated, most very quiet, and few happier for the experience. All, however, agreed they would be back in a couple of days.

"You know the crop circles thing," mused one Illinois blogger who lives near a corn field, "I can see how that just might work."

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Weather Bloggers Begin Group Therapy Sessions

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