Shawty's Blog

hello everyone...  been missing yall a lot.  just checking in to say hello

Hi Everybody...  It's been a while since I have been on.  How is everyone doing?

 

 

I know that I am a day late and a dollar short, but I want to say Happy Mother's Day to all of you and hope you all had a wonderful day!

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs, since the payment is pure love.

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.

'There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened. We all have a choice. You can decide which type of person you want to be. I have always chosen to be in the first group.'
 
Live your BEST life,

 

The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it's the same problem you had last year.

Any person capable of angering you becomes your master. He can anger you only when you permit yourself to be disturbed by him.

Happiness is mostly a by-product of doing what makes us feel fulfilled.

After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table.

Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her. "Hello. How are you? We've been waiting for you. Good to see you!"

When Saint Peter came by, the woman said to him, "This is such a wonderful place. How do I get in"?

"You have to spell a word," Saint Peter told her.

"Which word"? the woman asked.

"Love."

The woman correctly spelled "l-o-v-e" and Saint Peter welcomed her into Heaven.

About two years later, Saint Peter came to the woman and asked her to watch the Gates of Heaven for him that day.

While the woman was guarding the Gates of Heaven, her husband arrived.

"I'm surprised to see you," the woman said. "How have you been"?

"Oh, I've been doing pretty well since you died," her husband told her. "I married the beautiful young nurse who took care of you while you were ill. And then I won the lottery. I sold the little house you and I lived in and bought a big mansion. And my wife and I traveled all around the world. We were on vacation and I went water skiing today. I fell, the ski hit my head and here I am. How do I get in"?

"You have to spell a word," the woman told him.

"Which word"? her husband asked.

"Czechoslovakia."

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

Wisdom is sweet to your soul. If you find it, you will have a bright future and your hopes will not be cut short Proverbs 24:14

You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!  Do something fun and enjoy.

When I say good morning I mean:

G-od
O-ffers us His
O-utstanding
D-evotion to
M-ake us
O-bedient &
R-eady for a
N-ew day with Him.
I-nspire others please, and
N-ever forget
G-od loves you!

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened when she brings it 

 Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

I married a Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes A woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a Wedding Cake.

In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested. -------------------------------------------------------
------------

 A Polish man moved to the U.S. and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well. Until one day, he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. He said, "very quick!" The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him some questions. "Have you any grounds"? "Ja, Ja, acre and half and nice little home." "No, I mean what is the foundation of this case"? "It made of concrete." "Do either of you have a real grudge"? "No, we have carport and not need one." "I mean, what are your relations like"? "All my relations still in Poland." "Is there any infidelity in your marriage"? "Ja, we have hi-fidelity stereo set and good DVD player." Does your wife beat you up"? "No, I always up before her." "Why do you want this divorce"? "She going to kill me." "What makes you think that"? "I got proof." "What kind of proof"? "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read and it say '"Polish Remover.'"

After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, "I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you." The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years. But, the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night, I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you well"? she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. "I thought that it would be pleasant to spend some time with you," I responded. "Just the two of us." She thought about it for a moment, and then said, "I would like that very much." That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up, I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited by the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's. "I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about our meeting." We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half-way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small," she said. "Then it's time that you relax and let me return the favor," I responded. During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation. Nothing extraordinary, but catching up on recent events of each other's life. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you." I agreed. "How was your dinner date"? asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I answered. A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't have a chance to do anything for her. Some time later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said, "I paid this bill in advance." I wasn't sure that I could be there, but nevertheless, I paid for two plates: one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant for me. I love you, son." At that moment, I understood the importance of saying in time, "I love you" and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life is more important than your family. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off until "some other time." Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby. Somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "normal" is history. Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct. Somebody never took a three-year-old shopping. Somebody said being a mother is boring. Somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit. Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out good." Somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee. Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices. Somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window. Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother. Somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math. Somebody said you can't love the second child as much as you love the first. Somebody doesn't have two children. Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child rearing questions in the books. Somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears. Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery. Somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of Kindergarten or on a plane headed for military "boot camp." Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back. Somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies. Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married. Somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings. Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home. Somebody never had grandchildren. Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her. Somebody isn't a mother.

I want all my blogsters & bloggettes to have a wonderful and safe weekend!  It's beautiful any special plans?

I don't have any plans for this weekend, although there is plenty to do at home!

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the abode
Only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping all snug in their beds,
while Visions of Nintendo and Barbie flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
With a half-constructed bicycle propped on his knee.
So only Mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
Which made her sigh, "Now what is the matter?"

With the toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
She descended the stairs and saw the old man.
He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug,
"Oh, great," muttered Mom, "now I have to clean the rug."

"BOOGEDY BOOGEDY BOOGEDY!" cried Santa, "I'm glad you're awake,
your gift was especially difficult to make."
"Thanks, Santa, but all I want is time alone."
"Exactly!" he chuckled, "So, I've made you a clone."

"A clone?" she muttered, "What good is that?"
"Run along, Santa, I've no time for chit chat."
Then out walked the clone - The Mother's twin;
Same hair, same eyes, same double chin.

"She'll cook, she'll dust, she'll mop every mess.
You'll relax, take it easy, watch The Young and The Restless."
"Fantastic!" the Mom cheered. "My dream has come true!"
"I'll shop, I'll read, I'll sleep a night through!"

From the room above, the youngest did fret.
"Mommy? Come quickly, I'm scared and I'm wet."
The clone replied, "I'm coming, sweetheart."
"Hey," the Mom smiled, "she sure knows her part."

The clone changed the small one and hummed her a tune,
as she bundled the child in a blanket cocoon.
"You're the best mommy ever. I really love you."
The clone smiled and sighed, "And I love you, too."

The Mom frowned and said, "Sorry, Santa, no deal.
That's my child's love she is trying to steal."
Smiling wisely, Santa said, "To me it is clear,
Only one loving Mother is needed here."

The Mom kissed her child and tucked her in bed.
"Thank you, Santa, for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won't be very long,
when they'll be too old for my cradle and song."

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, "It works every time."
With the clone by his side, Santa said, "Good night.
Merry Christmas, dear Mom, you will be all right."

What are your thoughts on the cover ups in Iraq regarding Jessica Lynch, Pat Tillman and Luvenia Johnson...  Do you think the Pentagon should be held liable?