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Mr_Sandman's Blog

by Mr_Sandman from Hazelwood

Last Post 472 days, 8 hours Ago


Toy Soldiers
Aug 7, 2007 | 7:54 AM
Category: News
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 I am really at the end of my rope. After returning from Iraq a diffrent man and battling the Veterans Administration for service connected didability that they have denied twice now. I am closer to the edge than I have ever been. I am so angry I can't stand myself, everything makes me so upset anymore. From listening to pure stupidity pour from peoples mouth about the war and what should be done to the media's inability to show an ounce of compassion for the fallen soldiers, instead they simply state an number of the dead for the day and move on. The nightmares still come at night, and when my baby daughter screams it still is a trigger from Iraq. I have been going to the local shrink at the VA and it has gotten me no where quickly. Case and point the diagnosis they gave me was cyrcadian rythem disorder........yep thats what's causing my problems....my sleep scedule. It's like I am standing in a room full of people screaming at the top of my lungs and nobody hears me. I am reaching the end of my ability to deal, to cope with this any longer.
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Member Comments Total Comments: 8
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mechany144 read my blog view my photos
Aug 7, 2007 | 9:22 AM

Brother, get away from those VA shrinks ASAP! They couldn't diagnose a headache! I know it will cost to go to someone else and it should not, but to get yourself well you are going to have to. You have the classic signs of PTSD. How do I know? Been there and done that. SSM healthcare can reccomend a good shrink for you. You have taken that first big leap, you know you need help. I am sorry to say that a lot of us have needed help. Don't despair, you are not alone sandman. Seeing the crap of war is hard on anybody. Do not feel guilty, alone or frightened. Lean on you're fellow vets. We are the only ones that truly understand. Keep cool, get a new routine, stay away from the booze, and if you are a religious man talk to your pastor. If not, find one whom you trust.
Take care brother. You can talk to me anytime.
ANd know it takes time. I came back to the world in 8/2006. The nightmares have faded, they are still there now and again, but are now tolerable. Life does go on, just a lot different than before. GO AIR FORCE! AIM HIGH!
Flaglady read my blog view my photos
Aug 7, 2007 | 10:31 AM

Mechany144 is giving you good advice. It is a shame throughout history, not just current war, veterans do not get the help they need with PTSD. Some veterans I know are getting the help they need through the VA, very happy who they are going to and say it is really helping. I hope you can find the right person with the right qualifications to help you.
Thank you and all military for your service.
ljh3134 read my blog view my photos
Aug 7, 2007 | 1:03 PM

Keep talking with Mechany, he has the knowledge and experience of what you are going through. Thanks goes out to all of our military who have given up something to protect our country. Hang in there, get yourself well, enjoy being home. Thanks again.
LadyCardFan read my blog view my photos
Aug 7, 2007 | 4:47 PM

Mr_Sandman,

Keep on communicating. If there is anyway you can afford it, get your own therapist . . . let me know if you need a name for one that works with PTSD clients. If you do not have funds for this, I may be able to assist you there as well through an Angel we have on our side.

You can reach me M-F at 314.781.0199 x 4.
mechany144 read my blog view my photos
Aug 7, 2007 | 5:00 PM

So far brother you have 4 people that care what happens to you. A good start. LadyCardFan is a great person to go to for advice. She has resources that you and I have probably never heard of. Thanks darling for caring about Sandman. If his is not a cry in the wilderness I have never heard one.
Brother Sandman. Keep talking, it never hurts!
Rollagirl read my blog
Aug 7, 2007 | 8:57 PM

Mr_Sandman, I thank you for your service to this country, and I hope you get the help you so richly deserve and need. My thoughts and prayers are with you...I wish I could offer you more.
andyandeye read my blog view my photos
Aug 8, 2007 | 9:33 AM

I'm definitely w/ mechany! Run as fast as you can from the VA!

Please find a civilian institute that can help.

I suffer from PTSD as well. And I finally gave up on military help. I went thru St Mary's hospital as an outpatient. That was a tremendous step in the right direction.

If it gets too bad go to an ER, they can NOT refuse you treatment! Serious!

I'll be thinking about you!
LadyCardFan read my blog view my photos
Aug 10, 2007 | 8:17 AM

andyandeye . . . actually, while the ER can provide service, they do not have to admit you unless you state matter of factly that you are suicidal. Stupid huh?

Sometimes picking up that phone and making a call is the most difficult aspect of helping yourself. If you tried to call yesterday and got a busy signal we had a conference call and unfortunately all three phoned in separately, as opposed to one phoning and putting the phone on speaker . . . sheesh. Tied up all our lines for and hour and a half.
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Mr_Sandman

A 27 year old who recenlty returned from the war in Iraq. I served with the 101st Airborne division "Air Assault". I created this blog to raise public awareness of PTSD, "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder", and the effect it has on us soldiers when we return from war and are let loose back into the civilian world.

Member Since: 12/18/2006


 

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