FOX2Mornings

We don't usually "FIGHT" but we do disagree. Usually it's about something so trivial!!! For example, my husband insists on calling St. Joseph, Mo--"St. Joe's", whereas I have always called it "St. Joe". We have discussed this topic many times, but I guess we'll have to agree to disagree...LOL

There is fighting and then "there is fighting". My now ex significant other and I had fights over one of my children. This exacerbated to his becoming verbally and emotionally abusive to us both. The final straw was when he threatened physical abuse.

What I found was that he began chatting with the "men" in the neighborhood and they were egging him on, giving the "manly" view instead of talking between us. I knew both of these "men" were abusive to their spouses and I would never stand for such behavior. As soon as he became verbally abusive I tried to get him into counseling, but he would quit after one or two visits.

So, IMO, there is fighting and there is "fighting" and under no circumstance should anyone feel threatened in any way during a disagreement. A good disagreement occurs when individuals know how to communicate and do so "within the rules". Otherwise there is pain and heartache, not to mention reduced levels of self esteem.

On my nerves snoring and gritting teeth.
We fought one time( Back in 1976 I think) over biscuits.He said I only made them when we had company.So since then he gets canned biscuits everyone gets canned biscuits.Don't they Romn and Suz?

Never Lie to a Woman!!!

A man called home to his wife and said, "? Honey...I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his Friends.We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that Promotion I've been wanting, so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box, we're leaving from the office & I will swing by the house to pick my things up!"
Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pajamas!
The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she is, did exactly what her husband asked.
The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good. The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish.
He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to do?
You'll love the answer...? The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box!!!"
Never Lie To A Woman...!!!

Mostly it is things like asking him to do something and he is gonna do it in his own time which is not my time...so then I do it and get mad. Stupid.... But mostly we get along well....if we fight it is usually b/c one is tired and/or stressed and we take it out on the other....
We used to fight over many things! LOL...we have just learned it just isnt worth it. But I agree....depending on the kind and type of fighting you are talking about it can be good for a marriage...it is passion....

The only thing that makes "fighting" good for your marriage is the "making up". I think that we have learned in our 16 1/2 years of marriage is that marriage is work...its not about ME, it is about US. We have learned to communicate everything. It is not disposable.
We try to live out the 6 principles that are essential for a great marriage and those are
1. Trust God
2. Cultivate Communication
3. Celebrate Differences
4. Nuture Romance
5. Hurry Home
6. Finish Together

You can read more about these at
www.marriedlifeonline.com
We have also read some really good books
Red Hot Monogamy
The Five Love Languages
The DNA of Relationships
Men are like waffles, women are like spaghetti
and many others...

I agree with Stacy about the "Making up" part!
My husband and I met when I was 10 and we know each other so well! We really don't fight!

Sometimes I get upset when he is suppose to work on his "Honey Do" list, but the hours he works I understand how tired he is. Maybe I should just look into hiring someone!! LOL

Jeanette you crack me up!! Kelly I can't wait to meet Kurt! LOL

Is lots of little fighting good or is it the rare but big fights?

My husband would agree with you, but not me.

I never thought it was good for me to get hit, have my chair turned upside down with me in it., have the wires unhooked under the car, so I couldn't move the car, take the money out of the account and put it in one by himself.


Me buying all the food while he eats all the food. Him telling the children that people that love each other fight.

Sorry, I have another word for it. HATE.

I am single and would never get myself in a mess like that again. I THINK THAT i AM IMPORTANT ENOUGHT TO NOT BE A PUNCHING BAG FOR A NUT.

AMOM - sorry to hear of your struggles with domestic abuse. Abuse comes through verbal and physical forms and is very destructive - not only physically but mentally. GOOD FOR YOU..too many stay and struggle and some die trying to get out. It's amazing how many wonderful women find themselves in these situations. One of my best friends owns and runs a home for women fleeing this type of situation - she was a victim herself of an abusive alcoholic ex. Beautiful on the outside and very, very rotten on the in...That perfect red apple that is full of worms after you pick it...
But agree with Kurkel - there are good guys out there and there is a HUGE difference between a healthy "fight/ disagreement" and abuse...
Bless You-